A World Too Cruel
by Haley Hanson
Summary: He would take her place if it spared Wally the pain. He would lay down his life if it meant they got to love each other until the end of time. He would give anything, everything if it meant he could save them. Save them all.
1. Chapter 1

Beneath the Kevlar plating of his uniform, gooseflesh rose across Nightwing's aching body. While the night air was rather balmy, Dick was almost shaking from the cold – a frigidness born out of the misery of his memories and the uncertainty of his future. Tula, Ted, _Jason_...three funerals that he would never forget, three friends he would never get back, three separate agonizing wounds that would never completely heal. He knew what the loss of a comrade felt like, he _knew_ what it was like to lose Artemis.

All of them did. In fact the world had slipped into something reminiscent of déjà vu. He was sending his friends to their doom…_again_. But this time it wasn't a test, every loss was real, excruciatingly so. He trembled just slightly under the weight of that burden.

* * *

"Why, why would you do this to us?"

* * *

Wally's voice should never have sounded like that –strangled not with grief or fear, but pure unbridled rage. Betrayal bled from the speedster's wickedly green eyes, the sight like a sucker punch to Dick's solar plexus.

"Wally—" His sigh was as tired and shaky as he felt. Not that he expected Wally to notice. No one ever noticed, because no one ever knew when to stop pressing. It hurt. Jesus it hurt. But people just kept pressing, it wasn't their burden, it wasn't their pain.

Sharp and venomous, Wally was quick to cut him off. "No, goddamn it!" He heaved a breath. "No excuses. You knew we were trying to leave this behind us, the danger and the pain. But you just had to suck her right back in. Why did it have to be her?! Why not pick Zatana huh, or Bee?"

* * *

Deep down Dick knows that Wally understands why he picked Artemis, why he _needed_ Artemis.

"She's the only one who could have handled it." A little conviction seeped into his voice, because he needs to believe in_ something_ and Artemis is the best hope they have at the moment.

* * *

"Barbara could have handled it. Why not pick her?"

The question stings a little more than Dick would like to admit. He'd entrusted his darkest secrets to the speedster and having them flung back in his face stretched their fraying friendship that much further. "Do you honestly think I'm doing this on purpose, that I enjoy this? She's my friend too Wally." His whisper was quiet but the aftermath was damn near explosive.

* * *

"You don't fucking get it man! I _love _her. She isn't a friend," by the way he spits it out Dick assumes the word leaves a foul taste in Wally's mouth. He's beginning to wonder if the saying should be, "_Hell hath no fury like a speedster scorned_."

"She isn't replaceable, she isn't _you_!"

A breeze, tangy with sea salt whipped between them, ruffling locks of ginger and black –the silence broken only by the gentle lull of the ocean. Wally's previously fire fueled gaze faltered somewhat, but he gritted his teeth and made no move to take the words back.

Dick was at a complete loss. Before he could find the words Wally's shaking his head and turning toward the door, with a heartbreaking frown on his face. Through the emotional exhaustion and the pain –all that Dick can register is that, that frown shouldn't be there. It just doesn't look right.

* * *

He would take her place if it spared Wally the pain.

He would lay down his life if it meant they got to love each other until the end of time.

He would give anything, _everything_ if it meant he could save them. Save them all.

But he can't, it's a world too cruel.

* * *

**AN: Might be a one-shot, might be more. A big thanks to anyone and everyone that read/reviewed "Ten Knives."**


	2. Chapter 2

**Slight spoilers for: Darkest **

It was chilly outside, just enough so to warrant the black sweater fitted to his form. Leaves of amber and gold had started to pile up in the backyard just a couple of days ago. Nelson frolicked happily among them and Wally took a fleeting moment to smile, every now and again he had to remind himself that he still had the ability to pull off such an expression.

With uncharacteristic quietness he turned his attention back to the textbook in his lap. A slight vibration reverberated through the pages, his phone jittering for his attention. After a quick check of the number he sent the call to voicemail, in no mood to deal with uncle's antics. It was after the fourth call that Wally simply turned his phone off. Twilight was falling fast and babysitting the twerp for Barry was not one of his plans for the evening.

He was in the middle of some mumbo gumbo paragraph on the proper method of frog dissection when he felt the wind shift. Without so much as having to glance up Wally identified the trespasser. "Uncle B, I'd really like to help ya with the whole Bart thing but…"

"Wally—"

Something in Barry's voice made him look up. He notices the creases where his uncle's brow would be behind the mask, the way he's wringing his hands in a desperately nervous fashion. Something's wrong, terribly wrong.

A lump rose in Wally's throat, the end of his sentence dying away as he took in the disheveled speedster. His first thought was Artemis and the panic that washed over him was all consuming.

"What is it?"

_Who is it?_

There's a moment of hesitation, and Wally could _feel_ the way Barry's eyes were skimming over him.

"There was an ambush in Happy Harbor. Kaldur' and his team broke through the cave's defenses and wired it with a bomb like the one on Melina Island…Mount Justice is gone."

* * *

Every inch of his body throbbed in time to his heartbeat. His skin was battered so badly that the black and blue bruises could have easily passed for the suit that was covering them. How he had miscalculated the blast zone was beyond him, it was a rookie mistake even Robin wouldn't have made.

Quietly he let out a measured sigh; wincing almost immeasurably as his cracked ribs protested the expansion of his lungs. Conner and Mal had both insisted that he see a doctor, neither knew he had checked out against medical advice moments after they'd left him alone for evaluation.

Slowly Dick leaned in to bury his face in his hands, the lukewarm coffee he'd been sipping rolling uneasily in his empty stomach. He knew there were only a few more precious moments before Wally showed up, and flipped his shit. It took a moment but Dick managed to erase the pained grimace from his face and replace it with a slightly troubled frown. He squared his shoulders and straightened in small confines of his chair.

* * *

"What happened?"

The deadly whisper is punctuated by the sharp slam of a door. Wicked green eyes caught Dick's gaze when he glanced up and he couldn't help but turn away. He thought he was ready to face Wally's wrath…but for the second time that night he was wrong.

Guilt, crushing and all-encompassing washed over him and he struggled to find the words. "It was necessary." There's no conviction in his voice, only a shameful hint of pleading.

"Like hell it was! Kaldur' blew up the cave; he took three more hostages from _your_ team."

The subtle disownment hurt more than it should and as if compelled by a sense of self-preservation Dick rose to his feet. "The cave was just a place…" _Lie. It's a lie to your own ears and it hurts you almost as much as he does._ Shaking his head slightly Dick tried to quiet his internal monologue, but only succeeded in aggravating his concussion.

"We'll rescue the others when we rescue L'gann. Kaldur' will keep them safe until then, the flash drive explained it all."

Wally scoffed and Dick found the energy to send a glare in the speedster's direction, he was met with a baleful set of emeralds that glowed with so much rage it silenced any further reasoning that had started to form on his tongue.

* * *

"It explained it all, did it? Did it explain why The Light is still questioning Kaldur's loyalty despite the fact that he 'murdered' Artemis? Because from where I'm standing it's starting to look like Kaldur' is playing you, using your twisted wannabe Batman plan for his own gain."

Wally's been a knife in his chest since that night at the warehouse, and he'd just viciously twisted the blade. "Kaldur' is one of us, he wouldn't betray me." Dick can't bring himself to comment about the Batman jibe, the hurt from it is still settling in.

"He lost the love of his life, on one of _your_ missions. It seems like a fair trigger."

* * *

Dick's head snapped up at a painful speed, feeling as if the air had been sucked from his lungs. Wally had never threatened him before, had never torn so viciously at old wounds. There's a promise in his friend's eyes, one of such devotion that it makes Dick genuinely fearful.

"I can't guarantee her safety…I never could."

"That why I'm so worried for her." Those were Wally's parting words an edge of finality about them, but Dick couldn't let him have the last word. Just before the men left earshot he let a pained whisper pass through his lips.

"But not me…?"

The door slammed shut.

* * *

**AN: I'm a sucker for hurt!Nightwing...so if Wally seems downright awful to him, it's because he is.**


End file.
